What’s worth waiting for? I’ve been sort of forced into a stage of patience. I have a part of me that is irrationally awkward, with racing thoughts that liken to a spin class in my head. Why didn’t I get that phone call, who is that person talking to instead, looking at social media for updates. Of course, all these thoughts and behaviors are unhealthy and not serving me.
Things I am doing for myself: Focusing on skincare. I’m not going into an obsessive skincare routine. It’s pretty simple but I do indulge in a few luxe items. Dr. Bronner's Peppermint Castile Soap to cleanse, I do double cleanse with First Aid BeautyPure Skin Face Cleanser. I then do a creme cleanser, so I guess I triple cleanse, with The Rice Wash Tatcha Face Cream Cleanser. I follow it up with the Tatcha Dewy Skin Cream. Is skincare a distraction from my relationship problems? Probably.
Feeling comfortable in my body. I just bought my first pair of real jeans since maybe 2008. I bought them in my size, not a “maybe” size. A “maybe” size to me is a too big or too small size I will need in the future. I also threw out some older jeans that never fit well or were too worn out to save. Jeans take up a lot of space! I’m glad I’m investing in more staples in my wardrobe. Find my Seven for All Mankind jeans on sale.
Walking. Walking has been easier on my joints than running and I have been appreciating the neighborhood more. I don’t listen to music, so I’ve been more aware of people on the street, and the best part of it all is meeting cute dogs. When I say “cute” dogs I mean all the dogs, honestly. Walking has been helpful keeping my weight down over the past few months. During the winter in New York, keeping this up will be a challenge. I have the DB Method squat assist machine, it’s been very helpful and the workout burns for real! A ten minute workout maintains and a twenty minute workout burns like mad.
I suppose all these things can be considered distractions but they are serving me in my self esteem and health. Healthy distractions are ok in my mind. They are helpful as coping mechanisms while filling the space of waiting. In the meantime I can be a good listener. It’s odd but listening comprehension skills were always my strong point in the essay portion of standardized tests. I’m a good listener in meetings with clients. This is a good example of a transferable skill.
Being there. Just showing up, or even sending a message saying “I support you” can mean so much to show the people you love that you are present and there when they are ready. I try not to text too much but with certain people I know it’s okay to triple and quadruple text. Group chats with the right people can be very supportive too. It’s nice to have a small circle where I can be comfortable to share.
Genuine caring and meaningful relationships are the goal, and they are goals worth waiting for.
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