Hope is a strange concept, because I am striving for better not an end goal like joy but just better than what is now. I’m thinking about places I wish I could reclaim that are gone now. My childhood home, the bookstore I basically was raised in, these places have been torn down or relocated. I can’t smile again in these places. I do wish I could.
Holidays get to me still after all this time. This season I’m not really decorating, and I’m not planning on putting the tree up either. I think some decorative lights around the kitchen cabinets will be enough. I do enjoy basking in the glow of the lights of the tree on the couch at the end of the day. This year at the end of December I am thinking of going back to Florida so minimal decor to put away will be nice.
It’s nice to have something to look forward to in the dead of winter. I might move some dates around to mid January, so line up better with my best friend’s schedule. I’ve decided to live a bit more, have some more savings on the side, and communicate better with the people I love. That includes setting healthy boundaries.
We’ll also be doing minimal gift giving. Usually year round if I want something I just buy it. So this year I’ll be cooking all the things for mom and me. I like keeping my circle small and strong.
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